I'm Backkkkkkkkkk!

Of course, I recognize that my aide deserves to go on vacation, just like the rest of us. Nevertheless, I always dread the week I know she will be gone. Over the years, Sharon has become part of the family - she knows our schedules and we know hers. I believe, we have a great partnership. Some may say we are picky or quirky about the care of Muddear, but I say that's okay, we have a right to be. Sharon agrees with this sentiment.

Every time a new aide arrives it is like starting over from scratch and we lose that comfortableness that we share with Sharon. This week wasn't any different. Two aides were assigned to cover Sharon's time, but for some odd reason, the agency only scheduled 38 hours of coverage instead of 40. To begin with, the aides were late two days and that's just the beginning of the story.

To protect the innocent, I'll call the first aide Sandy and the second Jamie. Jamie was supposed to work on Tuesday and Wednesday from 8:30 to 4:30. I asked if she could stay until 5:30 to which she responded "no" for Tuesday and "yes" for Wednesday. On Wednesday, during the middle of the day Jamie called my husband at work stating she needed to leave early, but needed to make sure someone would be home. What?

I was sick on Monday and Tuesday and therefore was home all day. Thank goodness! Jamie didn't bring lunch on Tuesday and needed to leave to pick up something - the agency never notified her that Flossie could not be home alone. Huh?

Sandy was the aid for Monday, Thursday and Friday. Ironically, she had no lunch on Monday either - for the exact same reason stated by Jamie. On Wednesday, I received a phone call from the agency that Sandy needed to leave early on Thursday, but would make up her hours on Friday. No problem, I thought, I can work with that. Unfortunately, on Thursday she had a family issue that required her to leave after only a half day at work. Friday morning I received a phone call from the agency - Sandy called in. Great! Especially, since she had not completed half of the items requested.

To top matters off, it seemed like the aides were afraid to make decisions on their own. I recognize that Flossie was a new client for both of them, BUT... while I was sick Jamie knocked on my door to show me how much Flossie ate for lunch. She wanted to make sure she had eaten enough. Why do I have to make that determination? Common sense would say "no" if Flossie ate less than half of her lunch or "yes" if she ate more than half. If no, save the rest and offer later when inevitably Muddear will be hungry again.

This morning was Sharon's first day back. When I caught a glimpse of her, Sharon's first words were... "I'm Backkkkkkkkkk!"

Sleepovers

Last night, if you are located in the Midwest, you were subjected like we were to a barrage of snow and ice.

This may result in many different situations for you, for example school closings, longer commutes, office closings, and more, but what that always means for me in addition to all of the above is Muddear has a sleepover. Last night, in what has become Sharon's normal routine at the first mention of snow, Muddear had a sleepover.

The funny thing...I think Muddear truly enjoys the idea that someone is spending the night with the sole intention of spending time with her. Sharon brings her own blanket and pillow and camps out on the futon in Muddear's room. Even though I tell her to sleep on the sofa bed in the family room, Sharon always politely declines - preferring to sleep in Flossie's room. The two of them gab for hours like schoolgirls and the next thing you know, Muddear is fast asleep.

Well...you gotta love Sharon's dedication!

Snow Day

Yesterday, it snowed 2 inches in the Midwest and the city shutdown! Schools were closed "snow day" and traffic was gridlocked during the morning hours. Can you imagine?

Unfortunately, my aide Sharon had a car accident on the way to work which meant that I spent the day with Muddear. Thank goodness, Sharon wasn't injured but her car was possibly totalled. Actually, I was surprised when Sharon called me - she was hysterical! I spent 10 minutes calming her down and telling her what to do. You know like - call the police, call for a tow truck, etc.

Today, the saga continued...

Sharon wasn't able to get a rental car until late morning/early afternoon and she was "supposed" to arrive at 1:00 p.m. By 1:45 this afternoon, both Mike and I were in a panic because the aide had not arrived. Mike stayed home with Muddear but needed to leave by 3:00 p.m. and I thought I was going to have to leave work earlier than planned.

But it the drama continues on...

Earlier in the week I requested Sharon to arrive an hour early on Friday (tomorrow). Due to the weather, Sharon asked to spend the night to make sure she arrives on time. Please understand that Sharon is NEVER late for work, but since the accident she is terrified to drive. I really like Sharon, but this is a little bizarre. Like, where would she sleep?

However, because there is no way I can be late to work tomorrow morning, I think I am going to let her. (I do have a pullout sofa in the family room.)

Now I have been sucked into the drama.

Thanksgiving

There are many things I am thankful for...my family and friends; that the Lord has provided food, clothing, and shelter; health and healing both emotionally and physically; and the aides that faithfully care for Muddear.

Walter, Muddear's other son and my father, was rushed to the hospital a few days prior to Thanksgiving. Wednesday night, I spent time at the hospital and received several calls Wednesday night through early Thursday morning about his status. Therefore, it was a blessing to be able to sleep in on Thanksgiving morning knowing that Sharon, the aide would arrive bright and early to care for Flossie before we left for dinner. Between the family, work, and the hospital I was exhausted. (In time, Walter is going to be okay.)

It was nice to only have to worry about getting myself ready to leave on Thanksgiving day knowing that Sharon was taking care of Muddear. We packed Muddear up and left the house about 2:30 p.m. First stop...Glencare Nursing Home to visit with Phil. Muddear was so excited when I told her. She asked if we would stop by the store on our way so that she could purchase a candy bar to give to Philip. Very Cute!

Upon arrival at the nursing home, as usual, they were ecstatic to see one another. Hugs and kisses were shared and then Muddear's usual request for Phil to "stand up so I can see how tall you are." Philip, as usual, forgets to put the brakes on his wheelchair and we are yelling, "No Phil, don't stand up without your brakes!" About mid-way through the visit, Muddear pulls out the coveted candy bar (3 Musketeers) and gives it Phil - you should have seen his face! He was so excited to receive the candy bar.

I must continue the monthly visits, I think it does wonders for both Muddear and Phil. The funny thing is Muddear only stays about 30 minutes to an hour. Phil inevitably needs a smoke break and I think Muddear takes that as her queue to leave. The two of them may be in the middle of a conversation, holding hands and giggling, when suddenly Phil says..."Okay. Bye Bye. Thank you" and wheels himself away for a smoke break. Phil and cigarettes are like two powerful magnates.

After leaving the nursing home, the three of us headed for Mike's mom's house for dinner with the family. My side of the family was divided up between Mississippi, Indiana, and Ohio this year. While I missed my family, I think only having one place to visit made things a little easier on Muddear. She was very easy to get along with - all evening Muddear talked and laughed with the family. We managed to only have one anxiety attack which occurred when dinner was served. What is the correlation between dinner and anxiety attacks? Fortunately, Muddear "managed" to overcome it and ate a substantial dinner topped off with a piece of the chocolate cake I made for the occasion.

We probably arrived home around 10:00 p.m. Muddear was exhausted! I helped her change into a clean gown, dispensed final medications, and in the bed went Muddear. It was a great day for which I am thankful!

Things That Should Be Left Unsaid

Yesterday, Tuesday, was Sharon (the aide's) first day at work this week, because Muddear was still at Brookwood for her respite stay on Monday.

Sharon prepared breakfast for Muddear then woke her up to eat as is her morning routine. On this particular morning, which is quite common, Muddear wanted to go back to sleep after she had eaten breakfast and taken her morning medications. Sharon is really good at maintaining Muddear's regular schedule, therefore going back to sleep was not an option. Apparently, Muddear was not happy about this decision and began to fuss at Sharon. Considering Muddear's fussing is quite normal, Sharon never allows this behavior to deter her.

Unfortunately, Muddear became very upset and said to Sharon..."The only reason you won't let me go back to bed is because I'm Black!"

Thank God Sharon understands that Muddear has Dementia and didn't take it personally. How embarrassing!

4th of July

This year Mike and I hosted the 4th of July cookout at our house. With so much to do in preparation, it was a blessing to have Sharon (the aide) come to work on the holiday. The aides are paid hourly, so if they don't work, they don't get paid. Sharon volunteered to work and we were more than happy to have her here. It was a win/win situation.

The cookout started at 1:00 p.m. so we asked Sharon to make sure Muddear was bathed, dressed, and ready to come downstairs at the same time as the rest of our guests. Muddear always complains about coming downstairs - everytime we try to bring her down she becomes anxious and panics. In addition, when she gets downstairs she usually fusses incessantly after about an hour and wants to return to her room.

Yesterday, it was wonderful to see Muddear become a part of the festivities and not remain holed up in her room while the fun raged on around her. I think Sharon made the difference. Having a familiar face around to cater specifically to her needs placed Muddear at ease. For hours Muddear listened and engaged in the conversation. It also gave me peace of mind - I could entertain guests and not worry about whether Muddear was having fun.