Tips For Caregiver's

People with Alzheimer's disease frequently become more disoriented after dark or when waking. Leaving a night-light on in the bedroom may be helpful.

~WebMd

Sunday, May 30, 2010

The Next Chapter

It is with a sad heart that I write this post... Muddear left us yesterday to be with the Lord. While it sounds like a cliche even as I type, I know it is true - Muddear loved the Lord. I am thankful for the years I have had to care for Muddear. It was a shock to realize that I have cared for her for over 10 years. Five years in my home, a year and a half in the nursing home and almost five years while Muddear lived in her apartment after my grandfather died.

Caregiving has many ups and downs. There were times when the responsibility became overwhelming and then there were times when her laughter made it all worthwhile. There were times when I wanted to give up and then I would see the recognition in Muddear's eyes that she knew who I was and where she lived and there was a squeeze in my heart. There were even times when I wanted my life back with the ability to come and go as I pleased. And then I would remember how sick and depressed she had become at the nursing home and knew God had set me on this path for a reason.

For I know in my heart that being with Muddear, moving her into our home, prolonged her life by five years. As a grandparent she had given me many things. I was glad to have been able to give her those five years. That was the only thing she ever asked of me... "that if life would take a turn where she was unable to care for herself, could she live with me." I am glad that I was able to give Muddear that one thing. My life will have an empty spot that was once filled with caring for Muddear. I will miss her feisty personality, her stubbornness, and her joy.

I am thankful to God for His grace and mercy that gave us the strength to care for her. I am thankful for the family members (especially Sheena) and friends that assisted us in times of need. I am thankful for every nurse's assistant (especially Sharon), social worker (especially Bonnie), and nurse that made up our support system. I pray that God blesses you 30, 60, and 100 fold for your kindness and generosity toward us and Muddear.

And now we begin the next chapter in our lives. For five years, our lives have focused on two things: grandma and the kids. Grandma is no longer with us and the kids... well one is heading to college and the other has two years to go. My husband and I joked last night, that we could begin dating again. My heart fluttered!

146 comments:

Jane Carlstrom aka Glorious Hats said...

Good-bye Flossie. How many many hearts your touched as you granddaughter shared the ups and downs you both experienced.

Can just imaging Muddear beaming with joy at finding her son again; and looking over you Nikki, as you continue on in your life's path.

Signing off with both joy and sorrow in my heart. Hugs, Jane

Janice and Jessica said...

I'm so sorry! Muddear and your family will be in my thoughts.

Mom-Mom and Din-Din said...

GOD Bless you and your family. Muddear will be missed by all of us who followed your posts. What a blessing you and Muddear have been to us as we, day by day experience the ups and downs of caring for loved ones with dementia.

"Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him"
- I Thessalonians 4:13-14 (NIV)

Oyome-san said...

I'm so sorry...I just caught up on your news...so late.

You made Muddear's life full of order and laughter. You did good. :-))

Bassemsat said...

thanks for your article
i hope you see my blog Dementia Centre

http://dementia-center.blogspot.com/

Disability Training said...

On behalf of Program Development Associates, we'd like to send you our condolences on your loss.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

Dementia Carers said...

The care that was given to Muddear would of been well appreciated.

Sorry to hear for your loss.

mutuelle swiss life said...

Interesting post

Blog Specialist said...

While little can be done to improve dementia in those who suffer, family members who find emotional distress in the hardship of Alzheimer Disease can call for therapy to find better methods of coping.

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