Caregiver Struggles

I am embarrassed to say that last week I yelled at Muddear. She had been fussing about E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G! From not having enough money to not wanting to wear her gown because it had a split in it, to telling me that she was tired of me lying to her about the amount of time required to take a breathing treatment.

It was Friday night, I had worked all day, Muddear had been up multiple nights in a row, and I was T-I-R-E-D! I honestly could not handle Muddear arguing with me continuously about her breathing treatment for 25 minutes. It normally takes 12 minutes, but Muddear decided that the treatment was done and she was tired of me telling her that it wasn't. After 10 minutes, Muddear refused to finish the treatment and simply sat in her wheelchair staring at the wall. It was driving me N-U-T-Z! I was at a loss as to how to make Muddear comprehend the importance of taking the breathing treatment in its entirety. And truthfully, I did not want another night of Muddear yelling and screaming that she could not breath. As I contemplated the possible outcomes of my night, I started yelling!

Immediately, I realized that the best way to control the situation was to leave the room, which I promptly did. When I calmed down, I was very embarrassed and somewhat ashamed of my behavior. I could not wait for Mike to return home so that I could confess. It was a difficult night.