Tips For Caregiver's

People with Alzheimer's disease frequently become more disoriented after dark or when waking. Leaving a night-light on in the bedroom may be helpful.


Monday, February 25, 2008

Having A Bad Day...The Rest of The Story

After signing off yesterday, I was naively optimistic that things would improve. I was wrong!

Muddear finally consented to take her medication -which is a good thing, I couldn't imagine it getting much worse. Additionally she allowed me to give her a thorough bed bath - even better thing.

Now on to the chaos...

1. Muddear began asking questions about her daughter, Eloise, and expressing that she wanted to see her. Gently, I reminded Muddear that Eloise was dead and Muddear thought I was playing a joke on her. I tried to gage what year Muddear thought it was by simply asking...

"Muddear, what year do you think it is?"
"The year that it is."
"Okay, because of your question about Eloise, I am asking you what year is it?"
"Let's just know and I know."

Obviously, I was getting nowhere with the conversation and simply let it go.

2. Muddear decided that she wanted to visit her friend Mary. Great, except I have no idea who Mary is, where she lives, or even if she is still alive. Considering the above conversation about Eloise...who knows? Muddear wanted to put on going out clothes, which I kindly obliged. But when she began asking, "when are we leaving?" I knew there was a problem.

Repeatedly I explained that unless she could provide me with a phone number to call Mary, we were not going. Muddear could not remember Mary's address, although she knew the street. Muddear could not remember Mary's phone number or even her last name so we could attempt to look the number up in the phone book. When I explained this Muddear said, "Look under Mary!"

3. Muddear refused to eat ALL day long.

Let's hope today is better!


Glorious Hats said...

Definitely sending good thoughts and positive energy your way. These sort of days must be so stressful and frustrating for both of you.

njm said...

Thanks Jane. I tell you the biggest struggle is knowing when to stop trying to make sense of it all. Meaning - Muddear is clearly confused. If I don't try to explain she gets upset and possibly holds onto untruths as reality. Yet, even when I do explain, she forgets or just doesn't believe me so then I'm left banging my head against the wall. :-) WHere's the happy medium? Is there one?

Glorious Hats said...

I don't know. My grandmother was this same way. And what would work one time would not work the next. And conversely, what did not work one time, worked the next. It was unpredictable and resolution was variable. You do seem to be managing it well for both yourself and Muddear.

Your continually trying to find a way to get her back in balance is such a good thing. It is very draining and energy and time consuming, though.

What have you done for you this week? To relax, to laugh, to have special time with Mike or the children?

Not a very good answer, but the best I know is that your being in balance and OK helps to withstand the more difficult days.

Hugs, Jane

njm said...

Good point. I really haven't done anything this week for me. This weekend I hope to do a little shopping. (Keeping my fingers crossed!)