Barricades

Mike had to work late last night. Any time he comes home late, due to work or otherwise, it is typical for him to check on the kids and Muddear since their rooms are next to each other.

When he arrived at Muddear's door he noticed it was closed. We don't allow her to close the door because she always wakes up in the middle of the night. If Muddear begins to call us and her door is shut, we cannot hear her. Therefore, typical Mike, he opened her door and walked back to our bedroom.

Several minutes later, Muddear's bedroom light came on, she shut her door and I kept hearing loud bumping noises coming from her room. Of course, I had to investigate the ruckus and what do you think she was doing? Barricading the door! I initially had difficulty opening the door because she had placed the two tray tables we normally keep in her bedroom behind the door!

"Muddear, it is not safe for you to barricade your door. We need to move these trays."

"No! Somebody kept knocking on my door and opening it up. What do they want with me?"

"Muddear that was Mike, he opened your door, because we cannot hear you if you need help at night. He didn't knock on your door, he went into both of the kid's rooms."

"Well why didn't you tell me what you were going to do?"

"Muddear, you were sleep."

"I know that, you should have told me during the day that you were gonna open my door tonight."

"I did tell you."

"Oh."

After that Muddear was up all night - opening and shutting her door; turning the lights on and off; and yelling out the door..."what do you want with me!"

Sexy

Every night Muddear and I complete her bedtime routine.

1. Medicine and inhaler at 8:00 p.m.
2. Muddear selects and puts on fresh gown at 8:30 p.m.
3. Medicine and breathing treatment at 9:00 p.m.
4. Cleanse and medicate skin affected by skin infection at 9:30 p.m.
5. Final inhaler at 9:30 p.m.

Sometimes I am a half hour or so off our routine, but for the most part Muddear knows what to expect. Tonight during gown selection, Muddear began to study her gown of choice pretty intensely. Warning bells started to go off in my head - Muddear was inspecting one of the new gowns I recently purchased. She just sat there staring at the gown for what seemed like an eternity. I thought, "please, oh please Lord...don't let this be the beginning of an argument. I really cannot deal with an argument with Muddear tonight."

Out of the blue, Muddear says, "Ooohh, this gown has slits on both sides!" For those of you who have read the post Shopping for Gowns dated Thursday, May 17, 2007, you know that this violates Muddear's gown specifications! At this point, I began mentally preparing for an argument. So, I ignored the comment and kept watching television. So Muddear says again...

"Ooohh, this gown has slits on both sides! How SEXY!"

I thought I would explode with laughter. Fortunately I was able to keep my composure when I responded.

"Yes, Muddear...that gown is sexy." Now who would have thought?

Various Pictures of Muddear

Shopping for Gowns

I decided Muddear needed a few new items of clothing, specifically gowns. As you would expect, she is very particular when it comes to her gowns. I remember the first few times I helped Muddear get ready for bed, I would say, "Muddear, it is time to put on your pajamas so you can get ready for bed." She would look up at me and reply, "I don't wear pajamas, I wear gowns." Immediately, all bedtime activities would cease, until Muddear was clear that I understood this fact. I like to pride myself in being pretty quick on the draw, so I stopped saying pajamas.

As a 35-year-old woman in good health, I have never dealt with the type of physical impairment Muddear experiences daily. One day she explained, "I don't wear pajamas because of the pants. They are too difficult to handle when I have to go to the bathroom." Never having debated the pajamas versus gown topic with anyone, it did not dawn on me that the pants would pose a dilemma. Muddear's partiality to gowns doesn't stop there. She doesn't wear, short gowns, tight gowns, boat neck gowns, thin gowns, or sleeveless gowns. She also refuses to wear gowns with splits in the front, back, side, or otherwise. And finally, Muddear does not like any material in dark colors meaning navy blue, black, charcoal grey, or chocolate brown.

As you can imagine, shopping for gowns is not always an easy task. I typically have had success shopping at Sears; unfortunately, all of my errands recently were nowhere near Sears. Therefore, last night on a whim I decided to try Dillards. In the past, I have not liked their selection or prices, but I was hoping for a miracle. To my surprise, Dillards must have stocked up on "old lady" gowns. What are the odds that I would walk away with four gowns - all pastels; one short sleeve, two 3/4 length sleeves, and one long sleeve; all mid-calf to floor length in a size medium. Muddear may be five feet tall and weigh 100 pounds, but she would not dare wear a petite or gown sized small! Why? "I don't like nothing fittin tight on my body!"